#50

Ladies, Jamie Foxx is going to make you feel like you never felt before. He is going to work you over. He'll meet you in the bathroom of the club for a freaky episode. He will kiss you right below the navel, then rub you with oil on your ear. There'll be puddles in the bed by the time Foxx gets through with you. Girl, the rain is coming.

I know all this because Foxx says so—nearly verbatim—on his new album, Unpredictable, which descended upon record stores just before Christmas in a vaporous cloud of Spanish fly.

The Sexiest Sex Machine